Trusting Hope

So much has happened. Everyday I say I am going to write about all that has transpired over the last 8 days and then the days seem to fly by in flurry of laughter and tears.

Let me back up and write about the first time we saw our kids. Getting them home was tense up until 3 hours before they were to land in Chicago. They were rerouted and were supposed to arrive at 5:30 pm on March 20th. We were about an hour outside of Chicago when we received a call from our agency saying the kids were in NY and immigration officials were holding them there because two of the kids (one of which was Gormah) had the chicken pox. Immigration was seriously considering quarantining them. Now chicken pox is not some deadly disease. I am sure there is not a person reading this that has not had the chicken pox. I hardly think it warrants quarantine. So we hold our breath again. We had a plan to drive to New York but luckily they allowed them to continue home. We knew everything was okay by 2:30. We proceeded to our hotel and got everything ready for the kids to arrive.

At the airport we were permitted (thanks to Lori's persistence) to meet them at the gate. Every heartache we had endured was worth it once we were waiting at the gate. Airline staff were continually going on the plane and telling us how far back our children were. Strangers took pictures and watched our belongings.

Then we saw them. Walking aimlessly into an applauding crowd. They were overwhelmed and we were in love. Seeing your children for the first time is the best part about life. It does not matter if it is through birth or at an airport terminal, there is nothing like it. I could not believe they were actually in front of us. We were able to touch them, to kiss them and to care for them.

We took them back to the hotel. Lori and I deliberated quite a bit about whether to take them to a hotel or just get home. In hindsight the hotel was the best option for us. They wanted to take a bath. This was the first time they had bathed in a tub with running, warm water. We saw sheer joy. They rolled and splashed and jumped in the water. The bathroom had water from ceiling to floor. Glad we were in a hotel. The tub was filthy. Glad we were in a hotel. The kids explored every corner of the room. No cabinet, electronic device, water source or bed was left untouched. Glad we were in a hotel. We ate and made a mess. Glad we were in a hotel. I wonder what the cleaning staff thought when they saw our room. We partied like rock stars. They slept like babies.

The drive home was uneventful. They slept. I had had nightmares that Kuker would hate seatbelts and it would be a huge battle. No problems. The sliding doors on the van are a big hit and have been opened and shut more times since the kids have been home than the entire time we have owned the van.

We left Chicago in a snow storm and arrived home to a warm, sunny day. It was a great day to bring them home. We played outside and ran and rode bikes. Kennedy and Ben were thrilled to have the kids home. It was incredible.

Since coming home we have been absorbing them and them us. We are learning their likes and dislikes. They are learning no means no. No matter how much you scream, throw toys or throw yourself down the answer is no. They are getting it. It is a hard lesson. Once the fits are over they are very compliant with whatever triggered the fit.

For example, we had to have labs done on the kids. Gormah did very well. It took four adults to hold Kuker. We needed six. Blood was everywhere. Initially I was trying to get him to pee in a cup. He lost his mind. We are in the hospital bathroom and he is thrashing and screaming. I keep telling him to save his tears because peeing in the cup is the easy part of our little visit. The nurse is ready so I take him out and he gives the blood. To sum it up in one word would be "hell". Lori takes him back into the bathroom to get him to pee. The nurse continually checks with me to see if he has peed. Um, I am in the waiting room. They are back in the bathroom with you. You tell me. Anyway, I tell her she will have her pee. They emerge 45 minutes later with pee in a cup. Kuker is proud. We are tired.

We told Gormah that she had to have the labs to go to school. Afterwards she tells us they do not have to do this to go to school in Africa. I say, "welcome to America baby".

The kids cannot wait to attend school. Kuker actually had his first day on Friday. He did great. He wanted to attend. We had no intention in putting him in so soon. His teachers did a great job of preparing the kids and taking care of him. It was a really good experience.

They are doing very well overall. Much better than I would do in their situation. We are all having transition issues but we are making progress. They are happy kids. They are affectionate, open and sweet. They have an incredible sense of humor. They have given our family a depth and dimension we would not have without them. We are in love with them. We are so thankful they are home.

Another adopting mother wrote for us to trust our hopes not our fears. It is probably the best advice I have ever gotten. All our fears about adding to our family, adopting internationally and adopting older children are gone. They are the perfect fit for our family. All our hopes were exceeded.